children show freakout

ok, so there are two characters on the tv that my kids watch that freak me out, each in their own special way.

1) the damn alligator on Maisy. Maybe he's a crocodile. I dunno.l I think his name is charlie. he has this fucked up, crazy, person-who-has-mental-retardation voice when he does the sort of talking that passes for conversation on the show. he makes me feel weird.

2) stephani, on Lazy Town. the show itself is a bit strange, since they're always going on about the need to exercise, and not watch tv or play video games (you're a TV show, DUH). they call apples "sports candy." But the girl character makes me feel funny. down there. you know hwat i mean. should I get help? i don't look aat underage porn. teen sites are stupid. i can barely tolerate women my OWN age. why does this slim hipped, pink haired tom-boy waif engender this feeling. dunno.

you can call the police now.